What was your first trans experience like?

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Learning what I was dealing with was the first step towards my first experience of knowing that I was transgender. It was freeing, sure, but it also scared the holy crap out of me because I knew once I stepped out of that closet, I would be stepping into a wider world where a whole subset of humanity thinks I’m the worst piece of shit in the world, just for existing. And a bunch of other pricks would just see me as a nameless fetish object for their gratification.

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What should you answer when someone says to you in French, "au plaisir de vous revoir"?

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And through it all, that feeling of nerve-jangling dread. That feeling of knowing that something wasn’t right, but I didn’t know what. The constant adrenaline wore at me, stopped me from sleeping more than a few hours at a time. I started to feel like another depressive episode might be in the works. I stayed up late, surfing the internet. Somewhere in the second week I knew that something had to give, that I couldn’t go on like this. I was so far in denial and depersonalization at that point that half of my brain was just on autopilot, but I clicked through to the gender dysphoria bible and read their excellent and nuanced description of gender dysphoria, and realized that I’d been experiencing that for almost my entire life to one degree or another, but I’d been too emotionally numb to figure it out, or to listen to my own feelings.

then it continued like that for well over a week. Looking at my body in the shower and feeling like something wasn’t right. Looking at my face in the mirror and feeling not the slightest connection to the stranger looking back at me.

How many of you have had your parental rights taken away because of lies and no truth whatsoever, and did you prove the lies that were told about you to be false either through drug testing or another way, but still had your rights taken?

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It started as a gnawing feeling in my gut that wouldn’t go away, a pervasive sense of dread and free-floating anxiety, like a panic attack might at any minute erupt. Then…

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Why is there no great temptress figure in any of Tolkien’s major works?

Trans experience? Look, I get that you’re probably fishing for sexy stories so you can have a sneaky little wank about this later, but let’s look at the honest truth of my first “Trans Experience”.

But I did it anyway and fuck the haters.